My dream is my goal

I am ashamed that I have neglected my blog...and while I may only be talking to myself I feel I'm letting down the side...the side of one?

A lot is going down in my life and one of the major things is that I'm in frantic mode, pulling together CV's, portfolio's and cover letters. I have a hunger, a want and need if you will...actually there's two, but the one is to get to the United States of America. A big and different step in my life. While I always looked at the States as a place I'd like to look at it wasn't until I actually went there that I decided that 'this is where I was meant to be, it just feels so right'. Ever get that? Feel so comfortable in a place/country/town/marshy bog that when you returned to your place of current residence you felt empty, half complete and unnervingly alone? It happened to me...its still happening to me. I was lucky enough to visit two great places in the U S of A. The first was LA and the Orange County area. Never before have my coastal roots and surfing emotions swelled so much. First I was blown away by the beautiful heat that didn't make you want to sweat from every pore. Secondly, the atmosphere warmed me, it sucked me and said "welcome, you're home my son", the beach's hugged me with their sands and licked my face with their cool salty ocean waves. Forget what you see in the movies, nothing was what I had dreamed of or seen on the silver screen. It all seemed so much more real, maybe even 'smaller than life' (can I do that? Reverse 'larger than life'?). The reality of it all pleased me, its what sold me the 'dream'. I sat there and looked around and right there, on the beach of Long Beach, I decided, this is where I need to be, this is my dream, this is my goal.

I visited San Diego, Long Beach, Murrieta and LA for a day. I then headed out to the mid-west, out to Chicago, a place I'd never dreamed of visiting, why would I...right?

Approaching Chicago whilst in the AA flight I was met with a view of an outstanding city and the magnificent, unbelievably large, Lake Michigan. It can't be a lake, can it? Its huge! I'd like to call it a baby sea, a sealet...a seaby? No. Anyway. For the most part I spent my time outside of down town and it surprised me, it surprised me how I have been missing out in so many things in my life. Amazing street festivals, brilliant restaurants...awesome people. Riding on the L was easy, getting from one place to the other smoothly and efficiently. Chicago's transport kinda kicks London's in the fat old hiney. The lifestyle of the area I was in took me in as well, I felt so at home and felt a connection to the area. I was comfortable, at home. Down town Chicago is a site to see. Go for the architecture alone, it wont disappoint. The buildings stand with a purpose, overlooking the city's people and staring like watchmen out at Lake Michigan. There is so much to see, so much that I'll be going back, that I have no doubt of.

How can 'leaving' have different feelings? I left home, left my parents and friends heading for an unknown island that just happens to be the worlds great mixing pot. Heading to England from South Africa I was scared and anxious. Leaving Chicago and California I was heart broken, the feeling of leaving a part of myself behind was all too clear. "How could I be leaving?", "This wasn't right, I need to stay!"...I think I actually might have blurted that out to the flight attendant.

I live in England, I was born in South Africa. Neither feel like home. Feeling lost and alone while in your country of residence is completely unnerving. I have to move to America. Its my dream, its my goal.

Have you got The Sound?

I didn't know who the special guests were for this show but when Foxy Shazam took to the stage and entertained I was really impressed. After the insane and extravagant Foxy Shazam came the energetic duo of Matt & Kim. It must be tough only having a keyboard and drum set to create a show but somehow they did it...maybe it was the constant smiling of Kim that helped set the vibe or maybe it was just their great beats and catchy tunes. When the lights darkened and the guys from The Sounds stepped out the crowd went crazy but when Maja walked out in all her sexy glory the venue erupted! Besides oozing sex appeal, she really does know how carry the show and be a great lead lady. They played a great mix of the old greats and their new songs off of Crossing the Rubicon. I smiled from start to finish and enjoy every moment of it. It was a great night out with amazing bands. Thank you The Sounds.

I got Talent

Wondering into Brixton for the first time made me feel slightly apprehensive...only because I had left my 'shank' in my other jacket and what I had heard of the area had made me feel naked without it. Would I be knifed, mugged, shot or sexually assaulted? Well...actually, that last one doesn't sound too bad as long as it wasn't a large male thug. To my surprise, there were no muggings or knifings...and later on there would still be no sexual assault. Pity.

Finding myself standing at the front of the neon coated O2 Academy, I felt happy to finally be there to experience it...I hadn't seen its empty gut before. Even more exhilarating was the fact that it had 'BILLY TALENT' glowing on the buildings entrance...awesome. Getting inside seemed like a daunting task as the line ran almost around the entire building! But as soon as the doors opened the hundreds of punks, rockers and emo's (they're people to) started to file into the Academy's gaping jaws. I headed directly to the merchandise stand where I got my grubby paws on a great Billy Talent golf T. From there it was straight onto the bar where myself and my buddy Chris made the mistake of confusing Tuborg as a cidar and ended up with a flat beer-like beverage, should've just gone for the Carlsberg.

The entrance to the main floor leads you onto the sloped standing area...a gentle decline that creates a flow of 'human' towards the stage. The towering stacked speakers seem a little over the top for a venue that isn't thaaaaaat big (in saying that it does hold 4,921, wikipedia is very precise)

The first band to stand up and be counted was Canterbury. Really youthful dudes full of energy. Their sound was quite indie/electro/pop/rocky, now if that was too many descriptives then listen to them yourself and then decide. Next up was the Cancer Bats. All I can say for those dudes is that there was lots of spitting, shouting and jumping around. I would like to suggest to them to seek help and maybe also to visit a speech therapist. All in all the openers were good but if I had to choose who I would see again, I would have to say Canterbury. Congrats, you win a Noddy badge.

The main act. Billy Talent.
It just shows you how amazing they are, after their intro they get straight into it, there energy and presence (remember, just four guys) on stage is massive. The beat pulses through the massive hanging speaker stacks on either side of the stage. The lights rotate through reds, yellows and purples.



D'sa is a magical wizard on the guitar, his face distorted from the anguish of playing almost impossible riff's, sweat flying from his frozen black peak of a hairstyle. Ben Kowalewicz (come on, I dare you, try say that surname) is really funny when not screaming his vocal angst. Especially when he's chatting to the crowd about how we're missing out on halloween festivities...announcing that its all about dressing up like an idiot and watching all the woman dress as sluts which then leads him introducing the next song and saying that it is dedicated to the biggest slut of them all...his Ex.

From Start to finish their energy on stage is awe inspiring, there passion makes you want to live life a little harder, a little faster and with a whole lotta more fun.

Billy Talent...Thank you.

Hahaha, Drunk dancers

Oh man, nothing is better than throwing work colleagues, alcohol and an empty dance floor together. Its a demonic alchemy that makes even the most humble patron laugh and point and maybe have a little bit of wee dribble out. No, you can’t dance but please, continue trying! All in all everyone does have fun and even if the dancers (and I use the term lightly) realize that people are pointing and cackling...they just don’t care.

Tale of Craddick - Meet London 2013

Everyone thought the economy was on the up. It was at the end of 2009 but those great people in banking had other ideas. Unfortunately, even with a global financial scare, they still managed to screw it up again. Some said that they were greedy, others said that everyone had just become to precious about their money but either way you look at it, you cannot get away from the fact that on May 18th 2011 a massive crash hit the globe again...this one would be devastating. It was just simply known as 'The Crash' and it broke up everything. Funny thing though, is that everyone thought it would be the 8000 or so nukes that would eventually end the world. Who knew that money would cause the 'Riots of July' or the public hangings of bankers that began in the early months of 2012. The poor bastards had no chance. You see there just wasn't any cash around...which meant there were no more cops or law abiding security. To be fair, the police were urged to stay open and running with the only payment being 'the knowledge that you are doing good', it worked for a few months but after the murder count of cops went up to around 45 they just could not manipulate them into staying any longer. It wasn't TOTAL chaos in the streets though, people still had there morals and there was still trade amongst the people, they still wanted the things that things that they had become dependant on. Things were still getting made and items still had value. A bottle of Jack Daniels would get you about 1 hour of protection from a decent bodyguard or enough vegetables to last you a week. You could almost say that towns had become 'Western'...not completely lawless but tough enough that you had to have your wits turned to full alert at all times. London had become a giant Dodge City with a lot more hookers and drugs. Hookers and drugs flourished without the presence of police, in fact a lot of police moved into that line of business because they knew how things ran. Unfortunately the real thugs didn't really like the idea and there are only a few policemen in the business, or at least, only a few that would admit it.


Tale of Craddick - will continue.

Sonisphere!

I'm off to Sonisphere. A field of glory nestled in the comfort of Knebworth. All unassuming and all not knowing what is really coming...none of the villagers were aware of the hundreds of motor vehicles or thousands of feet that were on their way. The slow march descending on these meadows have one, and only one, mission in mind...we...must...rock! Tents are a tiny defense for the sound that is ready to roar and pound its might on all who wear the Wrist Band. International bands the likes of Metallica and Nine Inch Nails plug in their instruments of volume with quiet confidence. The terror and jubilation is viscous in the air, getting stuck in you nostrils.

I'm off to Sonisphere...and I'm bloody ready for it!

Relationships are like Ninjas...sneaky

Right off the bat I have to say, I'm no expert...far from it in fact. But, relationships fascinate me...to me they're one of the most complicated concepts on the face of this fantastic earth. Like mysterious 80's movie style Ninjas, a relationship can sneak up on you or, when you think have one close, they vanish in a cloud of ancient Ninja smoke. Now obviously, it takes two to tango and those 'two' would generally have to like each other or at the very least, feel that they found 'the only hope' (but that would be sad and doesn't really count). This is when it gets really tricky...how difficult is it to get two complete strangers to like each other? and where the hell do these two strangers meet? And no, no movie romance here...'rescuing from a burning building' or '"ooo...you have a dog! and I have a dog...and they like each other...awwwww"' crap. Where do the genuine, real life people meet? The kind of people that have jobs, a core group of friends etc. Clubs? No...Thats just dirty and never seems to lead anywhere...especially when the alcohol fades. Work? no...thats too complicated, unless the other person works in a different department that you would seldom or never see, but it does seem to be likely...especially if you socialise in 'work circles'. How about online dating? See, I don't think I could do that...to actually accept my fate...I am so useless with woman that I have to get them to like me via email before they want to meet? Please Lord...please don't let that happen to me. Perhaps when I one day grow up and realise that I'll never have a proper grown up relationship I'll just accept a life of strippers...prostitutes and fast cars, doesn't sound too bad, but not ideal.

In all my cynicism, I am a big softy...with a, vomit, 'heart'...who used to, in my angst ridden youth, write poetry and play my guitar whilst thinking of lyrics about 'The one' or that ever unattainable beauty thats always just there but never quite.

So, all in all. I'll need to find someone at work via an internet dating site...we'd both have to have dogs and at some point I'll have to save one of her family members from a burning building whilst beating off strippers and prostitutes.

Seems simple enough.